Last month we unpicked the pitfalls of reaching our goals and focused on the fact that it is not just about showing up, but more about how we show up that really matters. There is no secret that hitting targets and reaching our goals is difficult. To be really successful in this, our mindset requires the theme of this month’s blog – resilience!
“It’s not about just getting up, but more about HOW you get up”
I believe that time has come for us to rethink our approach to resilience. Too often the advice is flippant, superficial and, I’d go as far as saying, dangerous. The old view of just getting up time after time can only lead to a cycle of the same issues rising up time and time again. We get knocked down for a reason, too often because we failed to address an issue effectively. How often have you heard the expression ‘Go Again’? There is even a hashtag #WeGoAgain. But where are we going and how are we going to get there?
People are also encouraged to have ‘bounce-back-ability’; a phrase coined by sports coach Iain Dowey. But what exactly is this teaching us? To ignore our mistakes and just ‘crack on’?
For real resilience we need to:
Press Pause When we’re rock bottom we should reflect on why we are where we are.
Accept This is about accepting that problems and failures will occur and surrendering to this fact.
Get Curious This is key and I truly believe that curiosity is the hidden gem of resilience. What can be done differently? How can the issue be reframed and reshaped into success?
We should endeavor to accept that to get stronger we have to break ourselves down occasionally. Like athletes do when training, from time to time we have to start from a position of pushing beyond what we can really handle to allow true strength and resilience to be built.
Learning to Learn
Life is one long learning journey. And so the final part of our process of building resilience is about our personal learning. Mistakes that are repeated have simply become our choices. To avoid this we must:
Learn Reflect on and understand as much about what has happened and crucially why it happened.
Unlearn Once we understand the bad habits that led to the pitfalls and potholes that stopped our journey, we can make peace with them and accept that this is not our way forward and make a change.
Relearn Starting over is important and we have to invent of adopt better ways of doing what needs to be done.
If we can follow these simple steps then we can truly be resilient and get back, get back quickly and most importantly get back smarter.